Congratulations on winning Employee of the Month again! How did you do it this time?
I wake up every morning in my mail sack, have two bowls, then my inspirational Stonks brand Honey !sac's cereal. Due to my employment enslavement agreement, I'm not allowed to leave z-corp but I've found a source for some sticky sweet white substance similar enough to milk to put on top of my Honey !sac's. For lunch I scrape a bunch of the postage glue onto some beanless toast. Quick line of anthrax to get me through the afternoon. Dinner is often just scrounging the office fridges for laxative laced lunches, but on occasion I'll try to grab a milksteak while zaiBOT is busy trying to count the number of letters in a word. And for dessert: crocodile shaman eggshell gelato. Then I can begin my day. I'm pretty sure I am employee of the month for all my hard work and determination and probably a big amount of pity from the other coworkers who really just tanked performance metrics this month.
Hey Blebleble! You look like you have something to say! Do you??
I honestly never blelieved I would ever be EOM again after all the shenanigans to rig fix establish myself last time. I gotta say thanks to thrillhoo for forgetting-
-and to everyone else for their apathy. Without your lack of efforts I never would have stuck out as exceptional. And props to dud of the month, it saved the company, the economy and I'm gonna just assume therefore, the universe.
If you were a Ledger Keeper for a day, what would you do?
I would eliminate all employee debts and snedak in a few extra holidays... which were always there.
Would you make me a sandwich?
📎 Attachment:
!h heya thrillhoo ayo
!wasabi
!hmm !chip
!guh
